As Venus has just entered into its debilitation sign Virgo, a couple of days ago, I feel it would be useful for people if I share some insights on this difficult transit of Venus, especially in matters of relationship.
Why Venus represents Relationship?
Answer - Because Venus is signification of Water Element. Water Element is something which glues and sticks two things together. Hence, Venus represents Relationship as Relationship makes 2 people stick with each other.
Why Venus is debilitated in Virgo?
Venus is relationship and Virgo is sign of Conflicts. So, the simplest interpretation is that when Venus is in Virgo, it leads conflicts in relationship. Another reason is that Venus is relationship and Virgo is sign of Perfection. So, when Venus is in Virgo, we start seeking perfection in relationship, which doesn’t exist.
What we need to learn is that there is nothing like perfect partner or perfect relation. And it is about any relationship. We have conflicts in every relationship; may it be parent-child, siblings, friends or romantic relationship. So, this is the 1st learning of Venus in Virgo position, either in birth chart or in transit.
Then as per my experience of counsellor so far, I have realized that people are suffering in relationship due to projection on other person. Normally, we love to tell each other that I did this for you and I did that for him. Or if I am feeling like this or that in relationship then it is because of other person.
Parents say to their child that how much sacrifices we have done for you but what we are getting in return and after few years child starts returning the compliment as to how much he is doing and he is not getting anything in return? Well, no one does anything for anyone.
This small story may be helpful here to understand things –
"I am reminded of a story where a Saint was climbing hills of Badrinath with all his stuff on his back. He saw a girl ahead of him carrying her brother on her back. When he came near to the little girl, he said - Ohh what a great burden you are carrying on your shoulder!!!!
Girl got angry and replied - Burden you are carrying. He is not burden, he is my brother.
If you did something for someone then it is because there was love involved and basic act of doing brought you happiness. So you got your return of happiness at the same moment when you did an act. If you are asking something more then it is deal or bargain, it was never love. We always do everything for our own happiness and the day that act stops giving us happiness, we stop doing that or we start complaining about it. From that day, it becomes a deal.
People say that parents do so much for their children selflessly. Well, they are doing it because they are their own children. If they were someone else's child then let's see who is interested in doing what? So, there is selfish interest involved. It doesn't mean that we should disrespect our parents or elders or dismiss their contribution in our lives. I am just on the point that all our acts are motivated due to some involvement of love or happiness for self.
Introspect about it. There is always our own happiness involved behind all our acts.
As always, I think every retrograde or debilitated transit of planet can be better handled when we go within ourselves. If you try to project your frustration in relationship to your partner then you are here for a tough time. But if you just go internally to reflect on your frustration then you may realize your own mistakes in your relationship and things may be resolved. Even if you are going through a rough time in relationship then also reflect back at all mistakes you did while getting into such relationship and learn from those mistakes to not to repeat them again in future relation. This is also the way any retrograde time can be utilized in a better way.
If you just start projecting things on partner then he/she may also have lots to project and things may go horrible. But I agree that even this reflection or introspection is needed from both the sides. Only one person in relationship can't be expected to introspect every time. So, both partners or parties in relationship must reflect back during this transit of Venus in Virgo and resolve things internally rather than projecting on each other. And it is not only applicable during this transit of Venus in Virgo but it is available for every time we are dealing with people in any relationship. Internalizing your feelings and resolving them within yourself will be a much better option than projecting it outside.
Hope this helps. Thanks,