Interpretation of the Eleventh Rule of Love

Rule Number 11 — The midwife knows that when there is no pain, the way for the baby cannot be opened and the mother cannot give birth. Likewise, for a new self to be born, hardship is necessary. Just as clay needs to go through intense heat to become strong, Love can only be perfected in pain.

– Shams (to Self)

Context

This rule appears when Shams is travelling toward Konya to meet Rumi. Shams is fully aware of the hardships and challenges that may arise on this journey, yet he also knows that ultimately everything will turn out to be beneficial for him.

It is at this stage in the story that this rule appears.

Interpretation within the Story

This rule can be better understood when read alongside the previous rule, as the context and circumstances are not only similar but almost identical.

As Shams begins his journey toward Konya, he clearly understands the dangers and hardships involved in this task. At the same time, being a Sufi, he also knows that nothing truly meaningful in life happens without facing challenges directly. He understands that a Sufi must be prepared to accept both hardship and comfort, because it is the difficult moments that test and shape the real character of a person.

Deeper Interpretation Beyond the Story

Most of us wish for a smooth life without obstacles. However, the truth is that whether it is spiritual life or material life, growth anywhere in the world requires us to face challenges and difficulties. Periods of struggle play a very important role in everyone’s life. If we reflect on our past, we often realize that the most valuable lessons of our lives came during the most difficult phases. In other words, without those challenging times, we would not have received our most important lessons.

I encounter this situation quite often, especially when people ask about C-section muhurta. Parents or prospective parents naturally want their child to live a life without suffering. Their concern is understandable, but indirectly this also means that they do not want their child to go through the experiences that often lead to meaningful learning in life.

We can also look at this from another perspective. How much do we truly value things or even people that are always available to us without any effort? Usually, we value only those achievements for which we have put in our best efforts. Therefore, even in material life, hard work, effort, and challenges are necessary to achieve something meaningful.

In spiritual life, a person must learn to accept everything that life brings. This acceptance is the essence of spirituality. Even if obstacles and difficulties arise, they too are created by the same divine source. They may appear difficult, but they are often blessings in disguise, meant to help a person evolve. If a spiritual seeker still divides experiences into good and bad, or easy and difficult, then the journey of spirituality is not yet complete. A true seeker learns to remain open and receptive to all experiences.

This is why Shams uses the metaphors of labor pain leading to birth, and clay being heated to become a strong pitcher.

In the final line of the rule, Shams says: “Love can only be perfected in pain.”

This suggests that in order to experience the perfect love of the divine, one often has to pass through the heartbreaks and pains of ordinary love. Through these experiences, the longing for divine love eventually awakens in the heart.

In short, this rule reminds us that every experience plays a role in our evolution, and a true spiritual seeker learns to remain open and receptive to all that life brings.

Gratitude.